BIA MEMO
FROM: jaybate 1.0, director/janitor, Basketball Intelligence Agency, Langley, KS 007007-007
TO: Most Board Rats
RE: Mickelson psy-ops coming out party
Dirty informants brain washed in a hog wallow outside Desoto, KS, have fed BIA information once believed to have been stove piped, but now confirmed: Hunter Mickelson was thawed today from cryogenic coaching suspension in time for the Lafayette game and went basketball quantum. Mickelson played pretty much the way he was expected to play when he transferred to KU from UArk back in the mid 1990s. True, the decloaking device used to materialize him after thawing was not applied against a major, or a super major, or a hyper major, or a petaflop major, or a endorsement holding tank major, but it was still a very encouraging performance nonetheless. Some BIA staff genetic engineers and CBW specialists speculate that Mickelson may have had his DNA altered for the game, or alternatively that he may have finally recovered from an unreported kind of single nucleated, kissing-contracted disease that makes young men grow pale and fatigued for periods of time in college. These are only wild, ridiculously absurd speculations, of course, but bottom line, the kid balled today.
