🏀 KuBuckets Archive

What if a non EST team were to win it all, even inspite of all the apparent referee and seeding biases?

Shouldn't college basketball be "protected" from the possibility of an upset by a nonEST team that is STACKED by Putin, or a nonpetroshoeco oligopoly brand like FLORSCHEIM?

SHOULDNT WE BE PLANNING AHEAD AND ASKING ALL THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA OUTLETS TO COME UP WITH ENOUGH FAKE NEWS TO JUSTIFY THE BASKETBALL ELECTORAL COLLEGE TO OVERRIDE A NON EST TEAM FROM BEING DECLARED THE CHAMPION AFTER HAVING WON IT ON THE COURT?

Isn't an EST team winning the ring vital to our national basketball security interests?

Shouldn't we use our BASKETBALL ELECTORAL COLLEGE to override the on the floor champion sufficiently to throw it into the BASKETBALL HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES where BASKETBALL SUPERPAC CONTRIBUTIONS can pick an EST team to be the winner?

(Note: all fiction. No malice.)

If we cannot have a BASKETBALL ELECTORAL COLLEGE, could we at least have a BASKETBALL ELECTORAL UNIVERSITY?

How about an electoral junior college?

An electoral trade school?

@jaybate-1.0

D1 Basketball Political Wedge Issues (ranked by importance)

1. John Calipari

2. Petroshoeco's control

3. Jay Bilas "Sanitation of the Game" Policies

4. OAD culture

5. Duke attitude

6. Tournament bracket-rigging

7. Mizzou meth usage

8. NCAA gestapo tactics

9. Flopping

10. TV blackout policies

@drgnslayr

Elegant summary. It will be turned over to THE BASKETBALL DEEP STATE and it will begin triggering synthetic terror events to drive the wedges.

On the day that the basketball electoral college meets to overturn the on-court winner of the March Carney, several terror events will be scheduled to focus fan attention off the decision of the BASKETBALL ELECTORAL COLLEGE.

Wouldn't it be grotesque if something like this ever happened in real life?

@drgnslayr

I forgot to add that ELEMENTS within the FAKE BASKETBALL INTELLIGENCE AGENCY will make FAKE talking head appearances on major FAKE sports media to blame the FAKE basketball terror events on opponents that basketball fans have previously not trusted.

Remember: the key is not who wins. The key is to degrade trust in the authenticity of the sport. The relevant epigram is: if you can't win, don't lose. Delegitimize the victory of the opponent. It's all about destabilization after the event.

Rock Chalk!!!

@jaybate-1.0

grotesque? Yes.... But probable or possible? My guess, possible and probable.

Look at toddler sports. The PC crowd has pushed to remove "winners and losers" so "everyone is a winner" when, in fact, everyone is a loser because the competitive nature has been removed.

Not everyone deserves a trophy. I know it hurts many kids to not receive a big award. But failing is what drives them to improve. Trophies are special ONLY because not everyone is supposed to get one. It is a "special occasion" recognition product.

How long before that PC attitude crawls up the spine of mainstream America adulthood? It is definitely a product of leftwing philosophy pushing to end capitalism and start communism. Step one is to remove competitive drive. It all starts with sports.

I will not allow my children to participate in non-competitive sports.... FAKE SPORTS.

@jaybate-1.0

Isn't big money interests already colliding with competitiveness in D1?

Absolutely! The fall of all those amazing rivalries is proof of that.

@jaybate-1.0

I'm thinking big business has other plans for D1 basketball.

Here is what I think....

I believe big marketing wonks have put something else ahead of crowning a National Champion. National Championship is NOT the pinnacle of D1 basketball.

So what is?

The "Final Four." It is the branded monster in the room.

The idea is to promote (and financially exploit) the Final Four event, hence the four final teams.

Maybe we just get away from finishing the tournament. We crown four winners every year instead of one. Four times more than marketing territory!

@jaybate-1.0

So if we do that now... we agonize the public for a few years.

Then we bring back the actual Final Four playoff weekend.

Supply/Demand... it would be like bringing Liberace out of retirement!

@drgnslayr

Almost forgot. Most movies and commercials run the day of the FAKE vote on the fake BASKETBALL ELECTORAL COLLEGE will convey themes of war, betrayal and threat to safety.

And last but not least, the FAKE sports media for the FAKE EST TEAM and the FAKE sports media for the FAKE non EST TEAM will both show the same FAKE terror events and both spread fear and despair.

Oh, and FAKE video footage of FAKE terror events will be cropped from time to time with blurred borders to keep one from seeing that the scene is staged.

It doesn't matter who is selected the FAKE winner in the FAKE basketball tourney. What matters is that FAKE sports fans are traumatized into accepting whatever FAKE thing is done next.

Lies are truth.

Fear is confidence.

Ambiguity is clarity.

Assassination is life.

Never ask cui bono.

(Note: this post, and all others by the author in this thread, are fiction. They are intended explicitly as satire and entertainment. They are just a FAKE spoof about a FAKE basketball ELECTORAL COLLEGE.)

@drgnslayr

"Maybe we just get away from finishing the tournament"

Inspired insight.

@jaybate-1.0

"“Maybe we just get away from finishing the tournament”

Inspired insight."

So all Final Four teams are winners! And we take that back retro, too....

Which sounds better?

Kansas Jayhawks men's basketball - 3-time NCAA Tournament Champions

or

Kansas Jayhawks men's basketball - 14-time NCAA Final Four Champions

Hey.... Now even The Big Dipper becomes a winner at KU!

@drgnslayr

It's not whether you win or lose, it's how
you play the game.

@jaybate-1.0

I thought the slogan was "We are all winners!"

@drgnslayr

"EVERYBODY WINS...except the people."

That's my new bumper sticker.