Good news: Missouri installed artificial turf in their football field. Bad news: Their cheerleaders will have to find a new place to graze.
Bad news: Missouri's library was broken into. Good news: They've found a book to replace it.
Good news: Norm Stewart went hunting with Dick Cheney. Bad news: Dick missed again.
Good news: I-70 was built crossing the state. Better news: Time spent in the state for cross country travellers has been reduced.
Good news: Thiefs broke into the Mizzou arena. Bad news: Their quest for stealing final four banners came up empty.
Good news: TV stations in Missouri upped their coverage by increasing their broadcasting power. Bad news: More couches and TV's on front porches across the state.
Good news: Missouri lost the Civil War: Bad news: The Union let them back in. (history buffs, leave me alone on that one!)
Good news: The Mississippi River has meandered to the east into Illinois. Bad news: Even the Mississippi River wants to get away from Missouri.
Good news: NBA wanted to honor former Missouri players in the league. Bad news: They only found two.
Good news: Missouri left for the SEC. Bad News: The SEC wants to send them back citing that they're a classy league, and Missouri "is dragging them down". Even noted tree poisoner from Alabama was disgusted by the thought of Missouri being in their classy league.
RCJHKU!